As I got up from my seat on the ferry, there was a woman in the aisle wearing a gorgeous purple top with matching purple hair. Purple is a favourite colour (obviously!) and I was thinking of having purple streaks myself so I said to her “I love your hair, it looks great”. Imagine my surprise when she turned around and told me firmly that it looked all washed out, it needed redoing, it was normally much brighter. And she capped it off with the damning indictment “in fact it looks cheap”
I trailed off the ferry behind her wondering at her inability to receive a simple compliment and knowing that she was probably totally unaware that she had just been really rude. In reality she was telling me I had poor taste, poor judgement. And that I was wrong to like her hair!
Yes, she was arguing with me.
A friend was telling me how nervous she was about a corporate programme she was going to be presenting She also told me that her business partner in this venture had every confidence in her ability. I suggested she stop the argument she was having with him. “Oh no,” she declared, “I don’t have any argument with him at all”. “Yes you do”, I countered. “No, I get on with him very well”, she said. (Now WE were having an argument!) I pointed out that her business partner was confident in her ability to deliver the programme whereas she wasn’t, which meant that she was arguing with his opinion of her.
Plenty of food for thought here! How often do you take the position that you are less than someone else’s opinion of you and INSIST upon it?
In our world where more and more and more is demanded there is a plague of existential not enoughness. Nothing is enough – whether it’s our hair, our skills, our body or how much money we have. We’re in a constant argument with who we are and how our life is. Engaged in an argument without even realising it most of the time.
What if we were willing to let things be? To let go of the fundamental idea that there’s something wrong, we’re never enough, never quite there. It’s exhausting so imagine the energy that would be freed up when you stopped having these arguments. I’m working at it and I invite you to join me in this quest. Let me know what happens when you do.
Reprinted from an enews article from:Margaret Munoz, ND, DBM, DipCH, MATMS, is an international peak performance specialist, speaker, trainer and author who will help you to fast track your way to freedom from the effects of your past experiences and limiting beliefs so that you can fulfill your true potential and live a extraordinary life making a difference in the world. To make an appointment for a consultation (in person or by phone) or to enquire about workshops or speaking please phone (02) 9713 1956, or email her at firstname.lastname@example.org – or check out her website at www.tangibleresults.com.au