Last Thursday I had a coaching session with a woman I have known for many years.
Kate* is super smart and is returning to running her business after a few years living overseas and starting her family – she has 2 young children.
Kate said: “I’m really struggling with trying to do everything. How do people do it?”
Me: “They ask for help”
She continued: “No. There really is pressure to be able to do everything – do it all”
Me: “Are you sure they don’t ask for help?”
She insisted: “No, they don’t have help. They do it all themselves”
At this stage I’m pinching myself. Have I been transported back to a different time and place? Kate feels there is enormous pressure on her to “do it all”
Is the expectation to “do it all” still true?
Ever curious, I decided to do some research. It’s really interesting how many high powered, high achieving people never talk about the help they have to be who they are and do what they do.
I spoke to a house keeper who runs a household of 7 staff for a family in Sydney. You may even know the people he works for. I made a diligent search without finding any public reference to this team of people supporting this woman and her family.
Why is this an issue?
Personally, it really matters to me that these people never speak publicly about the team of people cleaning their house, feeding their children, fetching and carting before and after school, cleaning the house, the pool, the garden, taking pets for a walk etc etc
It really bothers me because it perpetuates this ridiculous myth that “you can do it all” or worse “you have to do it all”
These busy people say when asked that all it takes is “being really organised” or “if you work hard”
Which brings me back to my coaching client this past week. She has convinced herself that everyone around her is doing everything themselves.
Chances are they are not doing everything themselves – they have help, they have lots of help.
Why won’t they tell the truth about how much help it takes?
I’m super curious why successful people continue to perpetuate the myth that they “do it all”
Please don’t believe these fake identities presented on social …
If you need help – ask for it, find people to help you.
If you truly want to be able to achieve your goals, your dreams – you can not do it on your own
Of course, you are doing great. You get your family out the door every morning – they ate breakfast and they cleaned their teeth. They are wearing clean clothes. You run your business and take care of your clients. You manage the family finances. There is always food to eat and so much more …
The thing is many of the people I speak to feel overwhelmed.
I often feel overwhelmed myself with just how much there is to do ….
This year I decided that I was going to ask for help more often. I’ve really struggled to even make small requests for help and when I do it’s starting to make a difference.
A few months ago I had a session with one of my most respected Mentors and he said “Ingrid you cannot do it on your own. You need a team.” I’m building that team.
If you’re thinking about arranging for help or looking for assistance – give it a go!
Try it out
You’ll be glad you did.
You’ll be surprised how much more you will achieve! Now! Go! Get some help! Right Now! Go!
Seriously, the successful people are successful because they have help – ask for help!
Do you want help with your business? There are a few ways I can help you
You might like to read my book So You Want to Start a Business which is super helpful even if you are already started in business.
You might want to speak with me personally